Government and The Great American Legal System

Well, the votes are in, the ballots are counted. We've looked through countless tomes, novelettes and political magazines trying to come up with enlightenment about our legal system and our government. Luckily every one of them was a virtual comedy-house of laughter, so we had plenty of material to work with.

We discovered, much to our surprise, that justice, legality, why even our government itself, are ruled by the almighty dollar. And that's as it should be, since, as Ayn Rand once pointed out, the symbol for our country is the dollar sign. Slide the S over the U and you get $. Well, the original symbol had two vertical lines. Our forefathers were plenty smart. I wonder how it would have been if our foremothers had had a say in the matter. It's never too late to start over, but since I'm totally a-political (we already have enough people trying to run this overburdened land), I'll leave that to my very learned sisters who want the job.

Aren't you thrilled there are more women in government now? There are 17 women in the Senate! Of course that's out of 100. But 17% isn't so bad, considering we finally got the vote in 1920 and that was only, uh, 90 years ago. We wouldn't want to rush into power and change too much right away. I voted for Hillary!

Personally, I'm grateful there are so many women in government. Some may be assholes, but so what? At least they're female assholes! We've certainly been saddled with enough male assholes through the years. It makes for a nice change.

While assembling this issue, we found that our confusing system of punishment is of grave concern. What works best? Corporal? Capital? Fines? Spanking? What about incarceration? We stuff all those criminals into a nice comfy building, give them three square meals a day and lots of exercise, no unduly cruel treatment, a wonderful library and education, movies, loads of time to enjoy it all, and somebody else paying for the privilege...hey, when do I move in? The only thing these people can't do is vote. I don't know...give up my right to vote versus lie around every day reading romance novels. Wait, this is punishment?

So herein we invite you to take a glance at what runs our country. Some of it is governance, some of it is justice, some of it is just plain strange. But, hey, that's Government and the Great American Legal System.